My confession is, I don't know how to date someone.  I started dating when I was 18 years old. It was weird, but I remember it so well.  

My mother would do anything to get out of the house.  I was such a nerd back then.  All I cared about was hacking and making computer virus.  OMG. My mother pissed me off and I programmed a virus for her computer back in the day.  I used DOS to write the virus. The virus copied Window 3.1 to the hard drive until the computer crashed.  

So yeah, my mother need me to get out of the house.  

So, I went to a party and this guy began dancing with me.  He was older than I was, but I didn't care. He was interested in me; which was so cool.  

Well, because of my childhood religion, the guy who was interested in me wanted to get married right away so he could have sex.  

I met Brian and I was so in love.  He still has my heart and soul; even though I am gay.  He actually kicked me out of the closet.  

So now, I realizes, I don't know how to deal with a relationship.  

Being raised as a Jehovah's Witness:

1) First you meet someone in the church who is the opposite sex of you

2) You date for 4 months

3) You get engage 

4) Within a year, you are married

These are the four steps of a relationship, I only know about. I don't know what to do in a relationship; which could be why I fail in relationships all the time. I don't get know what to do or what to say.

I try to be supportive, honest and caring. But, it seems like it doesn't work or is it that I try too hard to make it work. I don't know.  

I may never get married or find the girl of my dreams, but I do love myself and I'm in a relationship with myself. 

Seriously, I don't know how to date and I wish I knew how to get a stable girlfriend who understands me.  

 

 

 

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